Robot Unicorn Attack Heavy Metal Game

Robot Unicorn Attack Heavy Metal - Distance-based action from the depths of hell. Literally.

Welcome to Hell

I am pretty confident in the accuracy of my statement when I say that Robot Unicorn Attack Heavy Metal isn’t your average distance-based running game. I’m also pretty certain that I am also speaking accurately when saying that this is going to be the only distance-based running game where you get to commandeer a robotic unicorn and guide it through the depths of hell while metal music roars melodically in the background: of this, I am utterly convinced. The success of the original Robot Unicorn Attack is undeniable, and I enjoyed it in spite of my indifference to Erasure’s song ‘Always’, so I knew that I was already in for some quality surrealism when stepping up to the keyboard to play this title. Factor in my once- fierce love for all things metal (the music, not the categorisation of of any element, compound, or alloy adept at conducting heat and electricity), and there was no way I could turn a blind eye to this sequel.

Hell in a Flash Basket

The game works in an identical way to the previous: simply run and jump between platforms using the ‘z’ button in order to attain the largest possible total distance, with three consecutive turns being tallied up to form a total which can then be published online if you so wish. There is now a double-jump function which allows you to traverse gaps between solid ground that you would otherwise succumb to; the dash function still remains and has the purpose of allowing you to smash through the pentagram-shaped obstacles that lay in your way (smashing into these or any other bits of terrain will end your turn).

I struggle to find fault with the gameplay itself, since it delivers everything that a distance-based title of endless running should deliver: rapidly moving terrain, obstacles and challenges along the way, the accumulation of score based the amount of time you manage to survive, and to top it all, the whole thing is set in the rather tropical climate of hell, which is neither here nor there but adds a certain ferocity and energy to the whole thing. In spite of the solid gameplay, the title doesn’t do very much to stand out from the crowd apart from attempting to be ridiculous, which was probably achieved more successfully by the original. Still, if I get sick of the orignal’s Erasure soundtrack, I know where to turn for something a little more distorted. 

There are Worse Things In Hell

It is difficult to tell whether the brilliance of Robot Unicorn Attack Heavy Metal lies in the simplicity of the gameplay, the ridiculousness of the concept, the melodic metal accompaniment (not quite dense enough in breakdowns enough to be referred to as ‘heavy’ metal, however), or the glam-metal aesthetic of the whole thing. I’ve tried playing it on mute without the music, and the game is only marginally less fun, so I’m guessing it’s a combination of all of the above factors, and perhaps a sprinkle of unspoken magic that only a mechanised unicorn can deliver to such a game. The game is definitely a solid, distance-based offering, though the novelty of the absurd nature of the whole thing does wear off pretty quickly. Either way, even though you won’t be spending hours on this title, you will almost certainly find yourself coming back for more of the madness. After all, my mind would find it impossible to comprehend a situation where this is not the case, since the title alone deserves a standing ovation from the crowd of unhinged maniacs in my head that are hungry for flash-based absurdity. It seems that only the Robot Unicorn series can stop them from getting rowdy in there.